This week's flower

Sorry, no pinball machine at the counter. The one account we found, SeedFinder's, likens the smell to baked goods with a touch of incense, and lists it as Bodhi Seeds' cross of Super Silver Haze and Wookie #15. How does it smoke? Ask us and we'll talk you through it.

Elvis has not left the building. Upstate Elevator Operators in Burlington, Vermont, crossed Elvis, an old-school Vermont heirloom, with GG4. Leafly likens the smell to a shiny pleather couch covered in glue gas, and it was Leafly's 2023 Budtender's Choice for Vermont. Ask us how it smokes. We have time.

Oh my darling, Clementine. We'll spare you the rest of the song. Tangerine and sweet orange up front, then lemon zest, citrus candy and a little skunk. Crockett Family Farms bred it from their own Tangie and a Lemon Skunk. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

Diesel, citrus and pine in the flavour, with something earthy and sweet underneath. One retailer lists it as Gas Mask crossed with Death Star, and no source we found names a breeder. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

Ask for the Godfather at the counter. No ring-kissing required. Spice and grape on the nose over earth and pine, then a sweeter taste. Most sources trace it to XXX OG and Alpha OG. Who bred it? Nobody's talking. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

Tuna Kush is as close as this shop gets to a fish counter. Skunk, earth and a hint of fuel on the nose, then a damp, earthy taste with blue cheese and a little sweetness. It's a heritage Hindu Kush line that went around BC as clones long before anyone sold seeds. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

No quest required, just a trip to the counter. Kush on the nose with spice and citrus through it, then pine on the taste. It's Kosher Kush crossed with OG #18, and Leafly, which also lists it as Holy Grail Kush, credits DNA Genetics. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

A starfighter from a breeder called Alien Genetics. Makes sense. They crossed Lemon Alien Dawg with Tahoe Alien (Alien Tahoe OG, by some accounts) and described it as raspberry sorbet with hints of lemon. Others find lemon, pine, earth and lavender. The original release is discontinued, so ask us about this jar.

We check ID, not egos. Compound Genetics crossed Do-Si-Dos with Kush Mints for this one, also listed as Ego Checker: nutty cookie and lemony citrus on the nose, a cool mint finish, and sweet fruit on the taste. Curious how it smokes? Come talk to us.

Fresh, sweet strawberry on the nose, then berry and a bit of skunk on the taste. The cross usually given is Strawberry Fields, out of Vermont, with a Haze. It also goes by Kyle Kushman's Strawberry Cough, though the stories of where it began do not agree. How does it smoke? Ask whoever's at the counter.

Garlic up front, sour citrus behind. AllBud gives the cross as GMO Garlic Cookies and a parent whose name our own rules won't let us print. Ask at the counter and we'll say it out loud, along with how it smokes.

Shuffle the letters of GMO and you get the name, which fits, since Ripper Seeds bred it from GMO and Kush Mints. Musky and savoury on the nose with a chem edge, then sweet, kushy and minty to taste. How it smokes is a conversation for the counter.

Musty and earthy on the nose, with spice, wood and pine in the taste, by most accounts. On our jar it's just Violator; in full, it's Violator Kush, the Barney's Farm cross of Malana and Hindu Kush. How does it smoke? Ask whoever's behind the counter.

Banana and berry up front, with a squeeze of tropical citrus and a little fresh earth below. The taste follows the fruit, creamy and sugary. It's the Slurricane #23 x Bluenana cross. Want to know how it smokes? Ask us. We have time.

Blueberry, gas and pine on the nose, then berry with some wood to taste. The usual story is Blue Dream crossed with Afgoo, though the origins are murky and no source names a breeder. For how it smokes, ask whoever's behind the counter.

Say it out loud. Yes, like soap, and the nose plays along: citrus, apple and apricot up front, then a chemical twist of perfume and soap. Deo Farms in Oakland built it from their own Pink Guava and Rainbow Sherbet lines, popped a hundred seeds and kept number 21. How it smokes, we'll tell you in person.

The name is the recipe: Fire OG and Skywalker. Kush and spice on the nose, with flowers, a hint of hash and a sharp edge of fuel, then pine and citrus on the taste. Nobody we could find takes credit for breeding it. How does it smoke? That's a counter question.

The Poison is a family name: Durban Poison, a South African landrace from around the port city of Durban. Crossed with Grapefruit, it's sold elsewhere as Grapefruit Durban. Citrus over earth and wood on the nose, and a sweet-and-sour taste like pink grapefruit. The counter can tell you how it smokes.

Chilly name, warm counter. Lavender and rose on the nose, with a little pepper behind. Leafly, Weedmaps and AllBud all give it as White Widow crossed with Cinderella 99. Come and ask us how this one smokes.

Earthy, with pine and citrus on the nose, and a sweet, fruity taste over an earthy base. It started as a clone-only cut in Los Angeles and is now in seed from DNA Genetics. They name OG Kush as the parent and say the rest is unknown, so we won't guess either. How it smokes, we'll tell you at the counter.

Open Pandora's jar and out comes a sweet smell with a spicy note. The sweetness carries into the taste, with a spicy edge. Paradise Seeds bred it from an Afghan landrace, an Indian line and a ruderalis, and it was one of their first autoflowers. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

Sweet, sugary berry on the nose with woody pine and a spicy, earthy edge, and the taste stays on berry and pine. The one published account we found gives the cross as AK-47, Mango and White Widow. How it smokes is a question for the counter.

Diesel up front, with earth, pine and a faint chocolate note behind it. GG Strains bred it from Sour Dubb, Chem's Sister and Chocolate Diesel, and it's also sold as Original Glue. How does it smoke? Ask the counter. We'll happily talk your ear off.

The till calls it Mendo; the full name is Mendo Breath. Sweet and earthy, with vanilla and caramel, and the breeder's list adds mint chocolate and fresh berries. Gage Green Genetics bred it in 2013 from OG Kush Breath and their own Mendo Montage. Want to know how it smokes? Come and ask.

Pink grapefruit peel and bitter citrus on the nose, then tart citrus and sweet grapefruit to taste. Every source we found traces it to Cinderella 99, which Mr. Soul of Brothers Grimm bred from Jack Herer and Shiva Skunk. Straight selection or cross? That one's still argued. Ask us how it smokes.

Take Ghost OG and Candyland Purple, shuffle the names, and you have Seedsman's cross. OG petrol on the nose, by the breeder's account, then spice and earth with lemon and fruit. How does it smoke? That's a counter conversation, and we're always up for one.

Sounds like a deli order, but we don't do crackers. Sweet berry on the nose, with the savoury musk of the original Cheese underneath. Big Buddha Seeds crossed Blueberry with a Cheese line out of Skunk No. 1. Curious how it smokes? Ask at the counter.

Gas Face is named for its smell, but it's also the face you pull at the pump. Fuel and diesel on the nose, with mint, vanilla and a bit of leather, then sour lime on the palate. Seed Junky Genetics bred it from Face Mints and a Biscotti x Sherb cross. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

Native Flower lists this one as an indica. We could not find a published account of its background that we were willing to stand behind, so there is nothing here about lineage or aroma. Ask at the counter — we will tell you about the jar in front of you.

GreenLabel Seeds crossed Big Bud Skunk with Jack Herer. Take one word from each and you've got the name, which saved somebody an afternoon. Sweet and spicy on the nose, with earth underneath. Want to know how it smokes? That's what the counter is for.

Also called Larry Bird, after the 33 he wore for the Celtics. Raptors fans can just say Gelato 33. Sweet and fruity, with fuel, vanilla and cream underneath. The Cookie Family and Sherbinskis crossed Sunset Sherbet with Thin Mint GSC. How it smokes is a counter question, so come ask.

Ask the internet what Pure Michigan smells like and you get chocolate, coffee, lime, gas and, more than once, ammonia. Two Michigan breeders, ThugPug Genetics and 3rd Coast Genetics, made it from Oreoz and Mendo Breath. Come smell the jar and settle it. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

The honey badger doesn't care. We do. Pine, peach, citrus, honey and cherry on the nose, in a balance that shifts by phenotype, then lime and peach in the taste. Dynasty Seeds bred it as Honey Badger Haze, from C99 and White Widow put to Ms. Universe #10. Ask us how this one smokes. We have time.

Leafly named it Strain of the Year for 2022, and the rest of the field took that about as well as the name suggests. Sweet and sour on the nose, with earth and fuel underneath. Seed Junky Genetics bred it from Gelato 41 and Sherbert Bx1. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

Yes, like the cookie. No, please don't dunk it. Chocolate on the nose with coffee and a little diesel, then creamy vanilla in the taste. 3rd Coast Genetics bred it from Secret Weapon and Cookies and Cream, and you'll also see it sold as Oreoz. How does it smoke? We'll tell you at the counter.

Weedmaps files it under its full name, Island Sweet Skunk; our till dropped the sweet. Grapefruit and tropical fruit first, then pine, earth and a skunky funk. Federation Seed Company released it from Spice of Life's Sweet Skunk, and accounts of the cross disagree. Curious how it smokes? Ask us.

Spice on the nose and sweet on the exhale, and a bit more pungent than any other Pedro's we've come across. It's a cross of a Dominican parent, White Russian and an unknown third parent. How does it smoke? Ask whoever's behind the counter.

King Kong. Please don't climb anything on the way out. Fruity, sour OG on the nose, then a sweet and sour taste with a hint of chocolate. Big Buddha Seeds bred it from Gorilla Glue and their own Cheese and Widow cross. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.

Earthy on the nose with grape and berry on top, most sources say, and Weedmaps finds some skunk in there too. It's Girl Scout Cookies crossed with Granddaddy Purple, by a baker who never signed the box. How does it smoke? That's a counter question, and we like those.

Brown Sugar: not the kind you stir into your coffee. Chocolate, sweet fruit and a little spice on the nose, then brown sugar cookies and creamy chocolate on the taste. GreenMan Organic Seeds bred it from Chocolate Trip and a line of Cinderella 99. How does it smoke? Ask us. We have time.